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Mop-Up Nitro

[page 4 of 4]

-Tony SCREAMED about all this bullshit....

-Back to Hogan and Goldberg still in the ring.

-This is what I saw in the this what happened on the live version?

-The show ends.

You know..they are trying. No celebrity stunts...a pair of debuts..some solid wrestling...and maybe and interesting angle or two. They are putting forth an’s about bloody time.

But...RAW was aces too. What do I do...what do I do?

F-It....Nitro wins. It can happen once in a while. it’s allowed.

Now get ready to get laid.

Okay you little monkeys, this is the moment you’ve ALL been waiting for....based on YOUR suggestions.....culminated and condensed from HUNDREDS of suggestions....and because you ALL need a little trim in your pitiful little lives....heat up those printers kids....

BUT FIRST.....(heh)...the previous idea here was to list all the SONGS....but I canceled that concept for a few reasons: 1) If you want to be any sort of stud, you’re not going to stop mid-groove and change CD’s; 2) Any “compilation” tape will make you look like
you were planning this....if you REALLY want to look cool, it has to look like these CD’s are in your player ALL THE TIME...not just for seducin’; and 3) Al Isaacs’ head would explode if he had to post the entire laundry list. I also had to condense the list BIG time or SCOOPS wouldn’t upload the column...after 50K it refuses to go any further. So if your suggestion isn’t on this list, tough shit. Everything is listed into three categories: ANYTHING BYS, THE ALBUMS, AND HONORABLE MENTIONS...I’ll explain the third when you get to it.

Oh yeah, at least two clowns said to let HER pick the CD’s....well, why don’t you let HER snip off your nuts and give you a shot of estrogen too while she’s at it.

NOW heat up them printers:


ANYTHING BYS (self explanatory I think)

Anything by Miles Davis, Orbital, Portished, Prodigy, The Crystal Method, Ben Harper, Goo Goo Dolls, Fuel, Sugar Ray, Leonard Cohen, Sublime, Molly Hatchet, Grand Funk, P-Funk Parliament Funkadelic, Dean 'F**KIN' Martin, Barry White, Marvin Gaye (BIG TIME VOTE GETTER), Tom Petty, Melissa Etheridge (homo), Otis Redding, Seal, Prince, Danzig, Cirque du Soleil, and Nine Inch Nails

THE ALBUMS (CD’s...Cassettes....MP3’s.....or even 8 Tracks ((but you might have major problems if you’re still using 8 Tracks)))

'Shaft' by Isaac Hayes

“Gentlemen” by The Afghan Wigs

Kid Rock's album

“Mixed up” & “Disintegration” by The Cure

“Dazed and Confused” & “The BBC Sessions” by Led Zeppelin (Oy Vey)

“Greatest Hits” by Journey

“Slowhand” by Eric Clapton

“Mr. Smith” by LL Cool J's (Anything by LL really..but hit the “repeat” button on “Doin’ It”)

'II' & 'Cooley High Harmony” by Boyz II Men

'12 Play' by R. Kelly

“Pulse” and “Dark Side of the Moon” by Pink Floyd

Al Green's Greatest Hits.

'Usher Live' by Usher

'Jar of flies” by Alice in Chains

'MCMXC' by Enigma

“Toward the Within” by Dead Can Dance.

“Urban Hang Suite” by Maxwell

'Love Deluxe' by Sade

HONORABLE MENTIONS (These are either very long songs and at least one
suggestions that had the audience split)

2 LIVE CREW (lots of votes...but also lots of people saying that this crap ain’t fly. I say this is the sheeeit you want to play when you just feel like grinding away and banging her head against the wall while you’re at it!)

Charles Mingus's 'Cumbia and Jazz Fusion' it's 27 minutes long and runs through a big sections that sounds like jungle tribal s**t...(NOTE that’s what the voter said...not me)

Indagodanavita (I KNOW I spelled that wrong..) by Iron Butterfly

'The End' by the Doors ( if played while she’s drunk)

“Paradise by the Dashboard Light” Meat Loaf (chicks love this crap)

“Strokin' by Clarence Carter

The 15 minute live version of 'Your Eyes' by Peter Gabriel. They melt
on this song.


“If you are alone with a chick while Elvis Costello's 'Alison' is playing and still don't get laid, you might as well turn your penis in.”

There you go. Everything you need to be the ULTIMATE MACK DADDY, BABY!!!!!! Try them on for size and tell me how it went....and you had BETTER THANK ME FOR THIS!!!!! Or at least remember this column next year if ScoopThis has survived long enough to run another one of those “Best of the Net” contests (Jury’s still out on that). I’m going to sleep....this has worn my ass OUT!

Think Scaia will thank me for this? Hell NO!

Name another wrestling web guy who’d do this for you?

My point exactly.

I rule.

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